June is here!

And although the thought of warmer weather and time away on vacation might sound like relaxation is on the horizon, for most families June also comes with a change in family routine that can quickly dismantle this. Where the structure of school used to dictate our day-to-day, we now have entire days at home, new schedules at different day camps, or getting used to routines with alternate caregivers. For kids who come from hard places, this lack of structure and unknowns can alter their individual sense of safety. Parents might see unwanted behaviors spark up again or increase.

Dr. Karyn Purvis and David Cross share with us in their book The Connected Child, that deep, primal fear can be responsible for triggering such behaviors and remind us that “parents can take an important step toward eliminating tantrums and misbehaviors – and enabling learning and positive family relationships – by providing an atmosphere where children feel and experience safety for themselves. We like to describe this strategy as providing ‘felt safety.’ This means that adults arrange the environment and adjust their behavior so children can feel in a profound and basic way that they are truly safe in their home and with us.”

So how do we provide this? When interacting with our child(ren), The Connected Child encourages us to: